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How do I ask my wife to cage me?  


Joined: 2 years ago
Posts: 1
12/09/2018 11:31 pm  




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This is something that I’ve wanted for a very long time. I’ve already given my wife dominance over me and my orgasms, but I want more. I want her to lock me up and never let me out again. How can I possibly bring this up to her? I don’t want to push her too far. How did you guys go about it?

Active Member
Joined: 12 months ago
Posts: 3
13/12/2019 2:51 pm  

I'm in exactly the same position as you were and im interested, one year on have you talked about it yet? and if so how did you tackle it?

I was thinking there were two different strategies. the first being one of admission of looking at porn too much, about not being able to cut the habit, that i think it effects our sex lives and that i want to inject something different into the marriage.

The other way could be suggest it as a game, a short term game to start with and see how it goes.

Personally i think the first would have the most chance of success.

what are your thoughts?

Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 1
20/12/2019 10:30 am  

Hello guys. I have had some kinky relationships and can tell you that women love talking and hearing their man express his emotions. If you make the whole Idea about them, then its even better. For example I explained to her that I take too long to cum when we made love because I had masturbated previously and continously. Women hate men masturbating. I told her: Please help me to stop this habit, because I cannot control it. Which is the truth. She agreed that she doens't want me to touch myself. We had previously experimented with BDSM games and I told her, have you heard of cock cages? And she said yes, I have seen some on some sex toys sites. So its possible that your wives are already aware of this sex toys. So no worries. I see that chastity begins to become a trend and it becomes popular. I also sent her an article how to be a keyholder by a womens magazine, which is directed direct at her female ego. Then we decided upon a silicon one and she ordered it. You schould be careful waht you wish for. As she sprinted to the post office with me, she was excited and I had a worried feeling 🙂 After some trouble putting the cage on she locked it. I can tell you that the first 3 days are really a mix of lust and torture. Its the first time I am locked and it is really a power driven experience. She left for the holidays to see her parents and saw it fit to let me locked up. So my sentence became 9 days.
I think that for a beginner this is a really strict sentence but she told me-you managed 3 days, 3,9, what is the difference and smiled at me. She also aknowledged that in these 3 days I became more loving and caring which is true. Which will she keep in mind the next time she is irritated with you. So try to shift everything to her benefit, which is the eventual outcome. She will be hesitant at first but will love the control. As a boy I waited desperatley to get the present for Christmas, now, for a long time, I just cant wait for her to come back and unlock me. That will be the best present! Happy Holidays!

Trusted Member
Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 18
30/12/2019 7:24 am  

I have read much about this whole chastity thing. The question "how do I tell my wife" is nearly often asked as the questions "Help please - I told her, but she declines it" and "my wife likes to play it but does not what I expect her to do / what my needs are".

In case your wife is not interested in any kinks, maybe because of religious reasons, shame or acquired habits, then you can tell it how you like - you will not succeed but maybe open a marital quarrel. Thats all.

In case your wife is a real open minden kinky one then there is no question how to tell her - do it and thats all.

In case your wife is somehow interested in kinks, but not that completely open minded or maybe ashamed of talking bout kinks, you should do what only thinking creatures can do: "quit pro quo" and "Do ut des".

Most men act much to egocentric. Me, myself and I, we want ... we need ....

Oh, and I have some benefits for you, my beloved! I will do no more masturbation (what? I didnt ever notice you do that... thanks for the benefit to know now) , I will pamper you more (Ok .... otherwise you do not like to pamper me? Ah, this is a menace!) , I will satisfy you sexual better (Come on, really? With your Cage on? With your tongue? What if I´d prefer a penis for sex?)

Not to forget: best play the cuckold card when discussion comes to that sex satisfying thingy. Got it?

Valued men, your intentions may be good (a little bit selfish too...) but please learn how to communicate without that damn overcasted egocentric!  Yes, dig for HER NEEDS, slowly and gentle. Yes, FULFILL HER needs first and then "quit pro quo / Do ut des" come up with one thing you really like!

Those benefits for your wife have to grow over the time, support her but let her find out by herself!

Give your wife the good feeling she is in control of all that, give her 100% confidence she can tell you all her (kinky) needs. Build it up from less kinky to more kinky, let it grow, accept failures and dont´s -  thats the only way you can tell your wife. This method has only one defect: it takes time! But that doesnt matter because the result is much more stable than all those "ok, I do not want it but lets try because you are whining such a long time for it".

In female affairs always believe a woman!


Behind every great man, there's a strong woman.
Behind every submissive man, there belongs a woman with crop and collar.
Did you know, most great men are submissive?

Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 5
30/12/2019 12:13 pm  


My wife and I started it as a funny game too, I would be locked up in my cage every month for a week when she has her period (she can't have much, I can't have anything, beside tease and denial) 

From there, it's grows over time, 2 weeks lockups, I had to listen and do what she says, give it time, you can't ask your wife to start and lock your dick for ever, baby steps. Women will see more benefits for them over time 

Trusted Member
Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 13
31/12/2019 8:57 am  

Just be honest! that's what marriage is about, right?

you could say you want it to become more 'real' for you and give her more control by adding a chastity cage in the game, just see it as a game, don't make a big deal out of it. Ask her how she feels about it and how she looks at this, tell her it has benefits for her also and indeed like BettyTom said, don't be egocentric.

Benefits for her could be, your gonna listen better to her (cuz she is the Mistress), you do some (more) chores in the house, maybe naked if that's possible in your case, caress her more often.

as an extra benefit, my wife and I have the rule that, as long as I'm locked up, I have to walk the dog before going to bed (normally it's her job)

good luck, let us know how it turned out.

Please don't mind my English, it isn't my native language.

Trusted Member
Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 65
02/01/2020 3:11 am  

   While I've been doing my chastity thing a long time,  by the way i got into it because I'm a regular  herd working macho guy but I'm very shy especially around women.  

   On her birthday several years ago I gave her the keys to the cage I was wearing.  She was  going crazy wondering what the keys were to.  I told her they were to something she's never owned,   and would never want to part with.   When I dropped my pants I assured her, YES,  it was hers and she'd have to take good care of it.     She couldn't stop smiling for days!!  while we've changed devices over the years, the original one is what I'm locked in for ONE YEAR 2020.  

J. Morris

Joined: 11 months ago
Posts: 1
07/01/2020 12:43 pm  

I suggested to my wife that she lock me in a cock cage after she decided I was watching too much porn (all different types, as I'm far from "vanilla)) and masturbating way to much, which often led me to not being in the mood for sex. I'm also bisexual, and a natural flirt with both women and men, it's just my nature.

I don't think my flirty personality was bothering her that much, but she was getting fed up with my constant masturbating. I was being selfish, greedy and putting my own desires before her needs and desires.

After some initial hesitation, she agreed to lock me in chastity, and we haven't looked back. I've become a better husband and a lot more attentive to her needs, rather than my own desires... And she loves the power exchange, knowing that she now has total control over when I'm allowed to get erect, but more importantly, if and when I'm allowed to orgasm. It's also led to her expressing more self confidence, becoming more adventurous (exploring other kinks/fetishes), and overall happiness. Our love/sex life has improved dramatically.

She does occasionally unlock the cage and allow me to masturbate, but only under her strict supervision, and I must eat my own cum (with no exceptions) if I'm gonna get myself off, and then the cage goes right back on. 

Asaphx2 liked
Joined: 8 months ago
Posts: 1
03/04/2020 5:45 pm  

I told her that I'm fascinated by the idea, and want to experience what it's like and need her help as keyholder.  On that basis, she agreed to a three-month trial.  I also explained the benefits for the woman, and hopefully, by the end of the three months, she'll want to continue with it.


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